Featured Post of the Week - Tales From the Fishelage

Pulled this creative genius from the Parody thread. A fantastic collaborative effort brought to you by Tractorbeams, Leah Kate and Ralphie:

Tractorbeams: "Let me take you back to November 2006...A wonderful month for Skaters, the 'I Do' promo was all over the place, avis with the word LOVE took over L-F, we kept replaying the promo, drooling over the way Sawyer pinned Kate against the bars…While Skaters were trying to determine ‘point of entry’, ‘spit bridges’ and other useful and interesting details to noone but us, the little Bubbles came up with an alternative script of their own! According to them Sawyer wasn’t actually taking Kate’s top off but was helping her remove the bag from her head!

That prompted Leah to write the That Damn Bag story! Since then we have been trying to find a way to make a parody of it but it was difficult to fit dialogue in that sex scene, seeing as Sawyer and Kate were devouring each other’s faces for the most part of it! Anyway this is long overdue but I am sure you will enjoy it!"


That Damn Bag!
by Leah Kate


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Ughh! Damn it! I can't get this bag off my head! Sawyer, could you give me a hand here?


Sure, Freckles. I'll do what I can.


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Whoops! Did I just take your shirt off?


I'm afraid you did, little lady. But that's okay. You can't see, so it makes sense that you don't really know what you're doing.


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That's true. I would have never taken your shirt off if I had the use of my vision. Help me out, okay?


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Aw, son of a bitch!


You just got my shirt too, didn't you?


I thought it was the bag. We are really bad at this!


It's an honest mistake. Damn it, I wish I didn't have this bag on my head! Here, I know. Lift me up against the bars, so you can see what you're doing.


Good idea


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Oh, God! That feels sooo good, to have that bag off my head. It's orgasmic!



……..in a completely non-sexual way, of course.



Of course.



Okay, you'd better put me down now, before someone sees us and thinks we're having Skex.



Oh, God, can you imagine? How embarrassing.



I know, right? Can't two people just get topless and grind up against each other without everyone jumping to conclusions?



Besides, Lost is never that obvious.



Thanks so much, little buddy. I couldn't have done it without you.



Well, that's what platonic friends are for.



Now if Jack happens to come by again, I'll have my face free to make out with him.



How is Jack, anyway?



Same as always. He yelled at me earlier, so I'm a bit horny.



Well, Jate is fate.



It sure is, Sawyer. It sure is.